Yoga - What happened when I (an inflexible 40 something) tried a 30 day yoga challenge

I've been putting off starting yoga for years now, only dabbling every once in a while. With the burnout recovery and some time off it seemed like the best time give this a proper shot. I'm not very good at keeping up with things that I suck at (see aerial slings and running) so I knew this was going to be hard going. Also not being great at showing weakness in public and some general body confidence issues, doing this myself at home seemed like the best option for me. So, like millions of others I went with 'Yoga with Adriane' on YouTube.

Starting out

I decided to ease my way in and started out with some beginner videos - even those were tough! Pushing up from foundations, soooo many downward facing dogs, energy up front body and down back body...feeling a bit lost to be honest. Honestly, watching this gorgeous, bendy, slim, lovely woman is not really helping my body confidence issues and with every move I can't help but think about what I look/feel like and which bits are wobbling/dangling 😬. I know the body issues are on 'the list' of issues for me to work through (I actually have a full mind-map diagram of my issues). The body issues have not quite made it into therapy quite yet with other priorities. I've got to just power through this I think and embrace the wobble.

After a good few go's at the beginners' videos I think I'm ready for a more structured programme so decide to go for the 'Centre - 30 day yoga journey'. Here we go...

First 10 days

Day 1 - I fall on my head trying to do the long downward facing dog and cannot hold the plank pose - great start! I realise the amount of strength yoga takes and how bloody easy the professions make it look! What I really like with Adriane though is her really gentle approach and her ability to teach all levels. She makes yoga accessible through suggesting modifications, encouraging you to move for your body and never assuming that everyone can bend in crazy ways (I definitely cannot bend like that!).

The days pass and I hurt! Day 6 is a serious core workout followed by day 7 which introduces full on flow (following your breath through a sequence of movements). I really enjoy the flow but not quite there with the moves or pace yet so this is tricky. I'm also struggling to stay in my body. My mind races and beats me up over the wobbles, not being strong enough and goes on random tangents. The flow helps though - there is no time to overthink, you have to just keep moving.

Days 10-20

Introducing side plank and down I fall again! Who the hell can do this stuff?!? In the middle of the 30 days Adriane throws in a stretching day on Day14 where it is really brought home that my right hip is crazy tight trying to wrangle myself into a pigeon pose. I am starting to feel a bit stronger though! I can hold a downward facing dog for longer (not as long as Adriane but still) and the planks are getting a bit easier. What I love is that there are recharge days built in throughout (you always know if Adriane is wearing comfy clothes) which are just lovely stretching or meditating sessions. These feel great mentally and physically!

Day 17 there's a lot of twisting your limbs into pretzel shapes - I can get onboard with that but struggling with the balance and keep falling over. Day 19 is called 'play' and the superhero pose and bum slapping at the end is definitely the highlight but I'm not finding too much more fun in this session. Overall though I am enjoying this challenge so far. Having to admit though that with life, travel etc I'm not doing it EVERY day so it's probably taken me about over a month to get through this bit but I'm not beating myself up about this - it's the showing up that's important!

Final 10 days

I made it this far! Slowly getting stronger, able to hold poses for longer, getting a bit bendier and keep up a bit better. As a perfectionist who's generally good at stuff this feels good - I'm not great at this but I am getting better!

Luckily Day 20 is a stretch, restore day - woohoo! More time to work on that old lady hip of mine! I'm actually starting to enjoy the uncomfortableness (not quite pain) of the stretching - hurts in that good way 😉. I'm also definitely seeing results in the flexibility - I can now quite easily grab my toes with straight legs. Still not doing that weird full body bend, not sure that will ever happen and I'm starting to know that that's ok.

Day 21 straight back to that bloody side plank! Getting better and I can just about hold it up one side, but not quite the other - progress though right! Day 23 onto the serious balancing poses in 'soar' and yep, more falling over. What I'm finding though is that my balance is such a reflection for how my mind is feeling that day. If my mind is centred, then so is my physical body.

I made it to Day30!! Probably took about 2 months but still I made it! The final session is an open one for you to make up your own moves as such so I tried to make it quite challenging but also manageable especially as I was outdoors practising on the deck of my partners houseboat (yes...houseboat - more on that later) and I didn't want to fall in the river or look too silly for boating passers-by.

Conclusions

It's been quite the journey through managing a busy mind, body confidence, an old lady hip, poor flexibility, bad balance, perfectionism and self judgement. I feel like I've definitely come out better! I'm still feeling and judging those wobbles and will be looking for a body positive yoga instructor (loooove Lucy B Yoga so might go for that) as well as give this some therapy priority.

My right hip is still one of an old lady (strangely the left one is age appropriate) and I'll keep working on this - any tips welcome! The flow sequences do really help my busy mind and enables me to get into my body more fully. I'm definitely stronger than I was - not near 'crow' or handstand ready but stronger. My core is soooo much better! This has been the real surprise and planking feels doable now. Finally the flexibility is improving - I mean I'm still in my 40s but it's been great to actually see the improvement even if it's slow going. I'm feeling really proud of myself for sticking it out and not giving up when it felt to hard. For someone who takes myself quite seriously (also on the list) I'm also really pleased to be laughing at myself when I fall over!

If I can do it, anyone can!

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